HELP WITH RELATIONSHIP PROBLEMS

HELP WITH RELATIONSHIP PROBLEMS

Don't let problems with your relationships spoil your life and get you down. Whatever the problem you are facing, professional help is at hand. Alix Needham provides a very fast and effective treatment to deal with a wide variety of different relationship issues.

Alix is a relationship and couple counsellor and has had many years of experience helping people to have successful and fulfilling relationships. Below are some of the issues that she can help you with:

•    Difficulty finding/ keeping a partner
•    Trust issues
•    Jealousy
•    Infidelity
•    Shyness / Lack of confidence
•    Abuse
•    Sexual dysfunction
•    Inability to end a relationship
•    Should you leave or stay with your partner
•    Inability to let go of a past relationship
•    Negative behavioural patterns
•    Getting over a break up
•    Any other problems with your relationships

Advice on Relationships

1 - A relationship is just like any other being, it needs love, caring, nurturing, space, and time.

2 - Learn how to let go. Holding on to resentments destroys the intimacy in all relationships.

3 – Try be Honest - a relationship is built on trust. If you cannot trust your partner, or your partner cannot trust you, then there is no foundation for the relationship. When someone tells you something honestly, even if it hurts, step back and realise that it was probably difficult for the person to tell you the information.

4 - Listen without criticism - it is probably one of the hardest skills to master, but it is also one of the most important. Try to listen to what your partner is saying without jumping in and criticising him or her. Just listen, and accept, and try to understand your partner’s point of view.

5 - Say you’re sorry - it’s not always easy to do. However, if you’ve betrayed someone’s trust, think about what you’ve done. Explain to your partner that you are truly sorry for that betrayal.

6 - Try not to compare your partner with past lovers - no person can ever be great at every single thing, or be all things to you.

7 - Long-term relationships involve making sacrifices, being kind, learning to listen, learning to truly forgive, learning the fine art of compromise, and a multitude of other skills. Love might conquer all - but only in combination with commitment, perseverance, and a willingness to learn.

8 - Love is a decision. When we realize this, we can decide, indeed must decide, sometimes as often as moment to moment, that "Yes, I choose to love this person." This is especially true when we do not ‘feel’ like it.

9 - Quite a few of us tend to drag up past injuries or hurts when we argue with our partner. This only adds unnecessary fuel to the fire. Make a pact with each other - agree that you will both make an effort to avoid arguing about more than one subject at a time.

10 - During discussions, when your partner has finished talking about a particular point, repeat back to him or her what it is you heard them say. Then give them a chance to respond and clarify what it was they were trying to tell you. Remember that what you heard them say may not have been what they intended to tell you.

11 - Know yourself, and clarify expectations - draw up a blueprint of what you agree your relationship should look like, and set mutual interim goals.

12 - Never give out of obligation or make your partner give out of obligation. Give and receive with an open heart and open hands, not a strangle hold.

13 - Pay attention to and express appreciation for positive things your partner says or does--no matter how small!

14 - Acknowledge your partner's feelings - You don't have to agree with someone to acknowledge and understand how they feel.

15 - Talk about your lives growing up. Share with one another your happy and sad memories. Childhood makes us who we are as adults - you can really get in touch with each other by sharing your memories.

.....and the benefits of getting help to improve your personal relationships are -

A greater understanding of yourself and others
An improved confidence and self esteem
A more positive outlook on yours and other lives
Enhanced and improved social skills
Much more assertive behaviour
Rebuilding trust
A sense of closure on past relationships
Learning how to express your feelings in more positive ways

A Final Word

Relationships take two people to work together and will take time to master but if you are both willing it can be a great success story. If you are finding it hard in your relationship right now and you would like to talk to a professional please contact Alix Needham on 0207 935 1965 or by email on info@alixneedham.com